This Is Damn Hard – #operationonestepatatime At Christmas

I just spent the day putting some of the finishing touches on the worship services that will take us right up to Christmas. I was folding bulletins, listening to Christmas music and locating the candles and holders for my favorite service of the year. I was singing, praying, preparing and thinking a lot about Carter.

Most everyone knows that we lost our son, Carter, this past August. We knew there were going to be some very difficult days to face without him. Anniversaries of adoption days. Birthdays. Holidays. Christmas is proving to be one of the most difficult.

Why wouldn't it be hard? It's Christmas. If I have to explain to you why that is particularly difficult for us – for anyone who has lost a loved one – I don't have enough time to explain it to you.

Don't pity me – or the rest of my family – but do know that doing the whole holiday thing this year is damn hard for us. Damn hard.

I have a blog, so I have a platform that I can use for anything I choose at anytime I choose. I think I just needed somewhere to tell someone that this is hard. Please, do not feel like you have to leave a message – however short or long – in response to this. Please, additionally, keep your most platitudinous of platitudes to yourself.

We covet your cards, thoughts and prayers.

I pray God's blessings for mine and yours this holiday season.


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